Wednesday, December 19, 2007

John Edwards Love Child Sex Scandal: Is This Thing Still On or What?

Are we still gonna have that John Edwards
Love Child Sex Scandal Thing?

We're gonna demand that National Enquirer turn in its membership in good standing to the Royal Order of Scandalmongers.

They pulled the story?

As we reported last time, kiddies, the NE John Edwards Love Child Sex Scandal (it does have a ring to it) was up at 1:15 and 3 am. It was down at 6:00.

Is this any way to run a scandal?

It's still down, but there a cute photo of Jennifer Anniston in a pastel T-shirt that made the trip over to the Enquirer worth it.

Surf's Up!
"John Edwards Love Child Sex Scandal"
UPDATE: AT 8:08 AM EST---National Enquirer Story is Back Up!

It's still up at Drudge, though.

And Meme orandum.

So, we're gonna go with what we got.

Rielle Hunter Still Pregnant!!

Reille Still has Nice Hair

We Still Have Chuck Adkins' Trophy!!

Still Proud to Be one of Chuck's "Morons-2007 Winner"

National Enquirer:
Make Up Your Mind, Or I'm Having it Without You!

So far in this scandal, by our accounting, we have:

1- Pregnant Ex-Edwards campaign worker

2- Names (Rielle Hunter was Lisa Druck)

1- Cool Trophy

1- Great Name for a Scandal (John Edwards Love Child Sex Scandal)

5- Stories that DBKP has written, including one with fake pix.

0- Stories up on National Enquirer's Website featuring a great name for a scandal.

1- Times I've been called a "professional blogger" in my so-called career.

4- Cigars left until we have to stop typing and go to the store to get more. (Can't have a proper scandal if you're short of nicotine, I always say.)

1- YouTube video of a John Edwards' ad they pulled, or something like that...we might throw it in here, just because we're big on multi-media presentations.)

65-T-shirts with "I'm John Edward's Love Child" on the Front and a Picture of a Trojan Condom on the back. We're not sure what to do with them, but I'm rooting for the National Enquirer to take a 3rd shot and we'll have a sale next time the first hour.

So, I'm not sure if I should take off my Scandal Party Hat or not.

Rielle was so cute, too.

At any rate, it was better than watching the eternal war between the pundits that see Ron Paul as the Second Coming of Hitler and the one that see him as the Second Coming of Christ.

And we never hurled chunks once during the whole "Love Child" thing, unlike the queasy feeling we get every time we have to read about how Mike Huckabee's gonna get over 1600 Electoral votes because he tells good jokes to the guys in the press tent.

And the John Edwards' Love Child Sex Scandal (it does have a ring to it, I'm telling you) was more fun than listening to people who profess to be strict secularists telling everyone that if Mitt Romney's elected, the country's gonna go to Hell.

Damn it.

I hope the scandal's not over.

At least, the scandal happened now, unlike the polls and the pundits who confidently told us who was gonna be Secretary of the Coast Guard in Hillary Clinton's cabinet.

I'm not giving up on this scandal thing, doggone it.

I'll be out for awhile.

When I get back, we're gonna have us a real scandal.

I gotta go get me some new sources.

by Mondoreb
[images: nationalenquirer;nymag]
[NOTE: I'm not giving up on this thing. I'll be back around noon EST, and I'd better see some hysterical denying from the Edwards' campaign when I do. Or somebody's gonna be in trouble.]

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