Trench Pro Wrestling Report: WWE Storylines are Poor

Who Writes this Stuff?



In case you haven't noticed, I haven't written a wrestling post in a few weeks. There's a reason for that. It's become clear to me that it's one of those times in wrestling history again that I'm embarrassed to be a wrestling fan.

While it's true that a true wrestling fan's wrestler is the RAW Champion in CM Punk, he's being booked as horribly as Rey Mysterio was when he was Smackdown champion. It's only a matter of time before either Batista or John Cena is champion again.

Here's the problem: WWE is insulting the fan's intelligence. I know intelligence and wrestling fan is kind of an oxymoron, but stay with me.

I can only suspend my disbelief in wrestling so far.

Take Kane for example. His latest gimmick is carrying around a thing in a bag asking people if he's alive or dead. If that happened in relative real life, he would have been committed for his own good. I kind of feel sorry for Kane because of all the crappy storylines he's been saddled with.

Over on Smackdown, HHH just happened to have a hidden camera in Edge's hotel room at the precise moment Edge cheated on Vickie. Not to mention the fact that the camera's quality was just as good as a regular HD TV camera. And who doesn't want to hold their wedding reception during the taping of Smackdown.

I know I harp on this every time, but this is why I still miss the original ECW. There were no weddings, no wrestlers rising from the dead into the sky, no voodoo curses making people vomit on camera. Just good fashioned mayhem and violence. Storylines were simple and revolved solely around title shots, competition, and hatred. One of the best feuds of all time if not the best was Tommy Dreamer vs. Raven and all it revolved around was the fact that they hated each other.

Nobody respected the fans more than ECW. They gave the fans what they wanted instead of telling them what they should want.

The straw that broke the camel's back was this past Friday night when the WWE went in the opposite direction and got too realistic. In a promo, MVP was cutting on Jeff Hardy: the real life tragedy of Hardy's home burning down with his dog inside was used as part of a storyline. I'm all for realism but using a wrestler's personal tragedy is taking it too far.

I turned it off at that point.

So is it too much WWE to ask for a little balance?

I'll probably still watch wrestling.

But only to tell you what's wrong with it.

by Trench Reynolds

WWE: Thumbs Up--For Now

Last week's draft got me to do something I haven't done in a long time, watch Smackdown. I was curious to see how having both champions was going to affect the B-brand. Edge and HHH gave really good promos to open Smackdown this past Friday.

SD! also seems to be trying to step up the women's division to TNA levels. While TNA's women's division starts to flounder but I digress. Anyway with the new top members of SD! I am looking forward to an Edge/HHH/Jeff Hardy storyline. If done right it could be the proverbial license to print money.

I didn't watch the Night of Champions PPV because I'm cheap and I don't have the time. However I was mildly surprised by the results. Matt Hard retained the US Championship while being moved to ECW. I'm curious to see how they handle that but not curious enough to watch ECW.

I like that they took the Intercontinental title off of Chris Jericho since he has a huge feud with Shawn Michaels going on right now. The problem is I really don't see Kofi Kingston as a suitable replacement but it's nice to see the WWE giving a push to some of the younger guys. Keeping the WWE title on HHH was a no brainer but the surprise of the night was Edge retaining the World Championship. I was so sure they were going to give the title to Batista so they could move it to RAW but for once the WWE made me look forward to Monday Night for once.

Which brings us to last night. Last night's RAW was definitely a roller coaster ride of a show which is what wrestling is supposed to be. How awesome was it that C.M. Punk cashed in his Money in the Bank title shot while Edge was on RAW for the night?

Not only did it bring the world title back to RAW but it also put the belt on one of the most underrated wrestlers on WWE TV today. Then imagine my horror when JBL was the first person to challenge Punk for the title. At that point I thought C.M Punk
had become the new Tommy Rich.

Then during the Punk/JBL match I was never more happy to see John Cena in my life. (Yep, I'm a Cena hater.) But that didn't guarantee that Punk would retain the belt. Luckily the WWE made the right decision, in my opinion, by keeping the belt on Punk. Now I'll be tuning in to see how long they let him keep it.

Thumbs up for now WWE. Just don't screw it up.

by Trench Reynolds
image: Trench Network

WWE: Great Giveaway, One Great Storyline; Rest is Forgettable

Trench's Pro Wrestling Report



I was going to do this post after TNA Impact and Smackdown, but let's face it: RAW is the only show worth watching these days. Which shows you the sad state of pro wrestling on TV today.

But speaking of Smackdown, you would think that Vince Mcmahon would want to do his Million Dollar whatever-he's-calling-it on Smackdown after it moves from CW to MyTV in the fall. He's going to need a lot more eyes on Smackdown once it makes the move. Hell, maybe he will come on in the fall. Vince isn't that stupid.

If he was, he'd have gone broke a long time ago.

As far as TNA goes, I really think they should focus more on the in-ring product than the soap opera antics of the Angle family. And I love TNA because I always root for the underdog. But they need to really differentiate themselves from the WWE, rather than trying to emulate them.
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The one great thing TNA has going for it is its women's division--or as they call them 'The Knockouts'. TNA's women are actually some great and entertaining wrestlers--unlike the WWE's former stripper division.

As far as ECW goes, I refuse to even watch it until they change the name. Yes, I'm an old ECW fanboy and I will not piss on the grave of that once-greatest wrestling promotion.

Getting back to RAW ratings. Last week's Million Dollar giveaway's ratings were actually down from the previous week. Maybe the buzz will have raised the ratings this week, but that remains to be seen.



I did register again for the giveaway, but I was not one of the two North Carolina winners last night. And what was up with Vince making the callers bark like a
dog or sing the National Anthem? I'm beginning to think that after every show, Vince has two fans fight to death for his own amusement in his own private arena. The winner gets to kiss Vince's bare ass. Anyway, I digress.

The only storyline really worth watching was the Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels bit. It started off a little better than it ended last week, with Michaels being blinded by the broken glass of the TV. Ric Flair coming out to defend Michaels, I thought was brilliant.

However, it all went downhill from there.

When Flair challenged Jericho to meet him in the parking lot, I expected an old fashioned beatdown of Ric Flair. That would have put so much heat on Jericho that people would watch in droves to see Jericho get his ass beat by Michaels--eventually.

But no; instead, we were treated to HHH sticking his ubiquitous proboscis into the
situation, and Lance Cade (who?) of all people, coming to Jericho's aid. I can kind of see him as the Cowboy Bob Orton to Jericho's Roddy Piper, but other than that, Cade bores me. If done right, the Y2J/HBK feud could reach epic status like Dreamer vs. Raven or the Freebirds vs. the Von Erichs.

But so far: it's not even Jeff Jarrett vs. Chyna.

by Trench Reynolds

Want more Trench--this time for crime? For Trench's weekly crime round-up and a list of Trench crime blogs, check out: Trench Reynolds: DBKP This Week in Crime, May 25-June 15

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